Tao 5/Day 273 “The Tao doesn’t take sides…The Master doesn’t take sides;”

“The Tao doesn’t take sides…The Master doesn’t take sides;” – Whew!  These words suddenly make me feel like I’m ‘hitting the wall’ as I approach the final stretch of entries in this running-and-writing ‘marathon’ on inner fitness.  As I sit here in my car at the lakeside parking lot waiting for the rain to subside, I start to wonder if I’ve really got what it takes to finish this experimental, experiential, literal-and-metaphorical journey.  – When the sun finally does peek through the clouds, I decide there’s only one way to find out, and exit toward the magic path once more…

’Not taking sides’ is a tough one.  It gets blamed for more short-term hard feelings than just about any Tao-trait that immediately comes to mind.  So many people in my world interpret the phrase as implying passive neutrality, lukewarm-ness, and/or a refusal to get involved in or passionate about life.  In the intimate relationships I’ve known or known about, the word ‘love’ itself is very often interpreted primarily as ‘blind loyalty’ – ie – ‘if you really love me you’ll take MY side, REGARDLESS’, or ‘the fact that I always take your side – whether you want me to or not – counts for more than any-and-everything else I may-or-may-not say or do’.  There is a ‘right’ side and a ‘wrong’ side in these human equations, a ‘good’ side and a ‘bad’ side, and – if I want to stay on someone’s ‘good’ side — I have to choose the ‘right’ side…right?  The Tao’s nature when it comes to such intimacies, on the other hand, is of a completely different order.  Here is the expanded version of the couplet that begins today’s entry:  “The Tao doesn’t take sides; it gives birth to both good and evil.  The Master doesn’t take sides; she welcomes both saints and sinners.”  – In other words, when it comes to intimate relationships, ‘I can be fully present for and supportive of you, without having to judge what you have judged and without judging you for doing so  – even if you then judge me for not giving energy to your judgements and how attached you are to them’.  This is the opposite of neutrality, the antithesis of being lukewarm – and such a challenging level of presence and maturity for me sometimes!…My current ‘practice partner’ is my three year old.  Logan is in a place right now where he is constantly expressing his love:  “I love you, Dazzo (what both boys call me), and I love Mommy, and Liam, and I love myself, and the moon, and Teddy (his teddy bear) and I just love everybody!”  – But, when I occasionally put him in time-out:   “Bad Dazzo! (even though I’ve never used that language with him)  You’re a bad Dazzo!”  If, at those times, I calmly and firmly say “No son, I’m not, and neither are you, but you’ve got to stay here til I tell you to get out because we don’t hit our brother in the head”, then it isn’t long before “Dazzo, I’m ready to say sorry” is sincerely spoken, and the love litany resumes as if nothing ever happened.  My love for him is never disloyal, no matter how much I don’t ‘take his side’, as long as I stay present…The colors are so vibrant on the path today.  So is the light.  This is what filmmakers call ‘the magic hour’.  As I finish today’s moving meditation, I’m not winded at all.  No thoughts either, AT ALL.  ’Amor Fati’ – the ‘love of my fate’ – is all I’m feeling right now…Just because the Tao ultimately doesn’t take sides doesn’t mean I can’t play the ‘role’ of my life to the hilt…Let me feel every emotion, knowing that in any game of life – even the game of intimate relationship – there has to be the ‘the other side’ to have a game at all.  – And let me give thanks for that reality as much as for any personal ‘win’ I might log along the way.  – I head home feeling like I’m ready – finally ready — to finish strong.

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One Response to “Tao 5/Day 273 “The Tao doesn’t take sides…The Master doesn’t take sides;””

  1. diane Says:

    magic read.

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